The fall quarter of sophomore year.
I was a pre-pharm student only because my mom told me that's the best job for girls and I knew of nothing that I really desired to do. The whole freshman year I just had fun being a pre-pharm student studying (=playing) with all those once-pre-med/pharm students (actually nvm many of them are actually in school now =P). For some reason, as I was staring my sophomore year, it just didn't feel right. I simply couldn't imagine myself behind the counter counting pills in a local drug store (i know pharmacists do much more than that but according to my understanding at the time). Especially as a life-time career, no way! I'll be too restricted in such a confined environment and my carelessness may well cause some serious complications with my patients... So with that thought, I started praying to God: "God, do you want me to be a pharmacist? Cuz I don't think I want to. If that's not Your will for me, show me. And show me CLEARLY what You want me to do with my life." I believe this was the very first time I prayed that "persistent prayer." For me being persistent meant the first few weeks of school.
While I was doing that, I was taking an econ class as a pre-req for pharmacy. It was an 8 AM CLASS! But even more shocking was that I actually went to EVERY class and studied pretty hard for that class. No matter how much I studied, though, I just couldn't understand all the concepts and theories.
One night, I believe it was the Sunday before the 4th week of fall quarter, my old youth group Bible study teacher Hyunah (my mentor who really took care of me as a baby Christian) took me to a Chris Tomlin concert. On our way there, I told her about how I wasn't sure about pharmacy, etc. and asked her what I should do. Her answer? Pray... Hahah I told her I had been, then she gave me some practical advice like try volunteering, which I was signed up to start that week. Without getting much of an answer as I wished to, we went to the concert, were blessed singing for the audience of One, and started head back to LA so she could drop me off at school. While we were walking back to the car, I randomly remembered how she used to tell me how she loves doing one-on-one's with people and I had recently discovered that I loved doing that as well. When I told her that, she suggested (or I asked, I forget) that I should consider being an O.T.
HUH?
Seriously, I had asked her 289349234 times what an O.T. was, but it always went right over my head. So again I had to ask her what that meant (seriously thanks to her patience with me!). She explained what they do (she was in O.T. school then). For the first time after 289349234 times, it kinda clicked in my head! And I went, "Ooo~ I would be interested in that!"
With that thought, I came back to school and headed to the library for an allnighter cuz I had a midterm for that stupid econ class at 8AM. I was studying ALL NIGHT seriously until 4 AM. And I was fed up. I just DID NOT GET IT! SO I headed over to the computers and looked up the last day to drop classes: That week was the last, so I decided whatever I do I know it's NOT pharmacy and clicked the "drop" button. Boy, was I SUPER HAPPY!! HAHA I had to tell someone and there was an unni from KCM that was studying so I went to her and told her all about how I dropped the class when the midterm is in 4 hours and how I'm not doing pharmacy anymore but now considering O.T. Guess what? She was pre-pre-med student now considering to be an O.T. as well! So we ended up talking til the sun rose about all kinds of things and she suggested that I come visit her volunteer place where O.T.'s work with children with autism. So later that morning, I went to visit and I loved it, so I went in for my volunteer interview and asked them to place me there instead of pharmacy dept. I volunteered there for a little less than a year I believe?
So that was that. I also had been volunteering at this place called Graceland, a rehabilitation for adults with disabilties since high school, at first for college credit. By that time, I still went out every Saturdays without really a reason. I felt very useless there since all I did there was eat.. HAHA.. but yeah, I was wondering why I kept on going out when I wasn't getting anything from there and I wasn't contributing anything to that place. I clearly remember it was when I was walking back from Westwood to the apts that it hit me that... God kept me there!! Years of working with adults with disability?! O.T.?! Wow, it was pretty amazing when I had that revelation. God knew I needed such experience to become an O.T., or at least decide to!
One thing I did worry about was my mom. What am I going to tell her? But somehow I got the guts to bring it up to her on our way home from school. At first, she seemed very upset and I was crying telling her it's something that God had told me to do... I thought she wasn't fond of it until later I went to my family's cell group meeting. A jipsanim came up and gave me $20 telling me how she's so proud of me for pursuing O.T. Apparently my mom had shared with her cell group about what happened with me and she NEVEr sharesss!! Yeah, that was definitely encouraging!
After this crazy series of clarity in His answering my prayer (I'm sure I'm missing some things too), I was MADLY spiritually high. No joke. Everything was BEAUTIFUL. I walked around giggling by myself -___- then it faded and I fell like no other. I was dependent on this blessing God has given me more than I was dependent on Him and His WORD! At that time, I didn't even understand why I fell so hard until a year later when I heard the first sermon preached by Pastor Awax at our servant team retreat...
Anyhow, so I've had many ups and downs. Doubts. Thinking "did i just force these puzzle pieces things together when they didnt fit in the first place?" But God has been so good to me to convict me once again, opening opportunities to intern and volunteer and get to know what an O.T. is about, at least way more than I had before even though I'm sure I don't know everything of what an O.T. does. All I know is that as an occupational therapist (O.T.), you help others live a meaningful life. And I pray that I not only help them have meaningful lives in the worldly sense but help them find true meaning of life. Life in Him.
I will be starting school in January and I'm super excited for it! Even though I was quite taken aback when I got rejected the first time, now I am so grateful that I had this year of 2010 to grow in the Lord.
Pray for me that I would never forget His calling and His goodness through it all and that I would always seek Him not the blessings He gives and live a very MEANINGFUL life myself before I can help others through His help. God is ABLE.If you read this whole thing, WOW.
My sister told me I need to learn to summarize things...
but its super hard as you can see -__-
